Vulnerability In Social Media. What You Need To Know To Do It Right.

When my husband asked me for a picture of us in 2009, I immediately knew the #10yearchallenge went viral. He is never up to social media trends! So, of course, I wanted to jump into the challenge… until I checked out the stories that people were sharing.

What’s wrong with the #10yearchallenge? 

There is nothing wrong. In a simple answer, you’re just supposed to share a picture side by side comparing your life in 2009 vs your life in 2019. The problem is that the trend went way too far in how people curated their lives.

In case you haven’t checked, go ahead and search on Instagram for the #10yearchallenge. You will the search results and will find Instagram influencers with unbelievable stories!  Based on those search results, you will think that the world turned into a better place within the last 10 years.

This made me wonder… why do most people feel the urge to curate their lives on social media? Don’t we connect better when we are vulnerable and real? Then, why don’t people just show more vulnerability?

If you’re wondering where the line is between sharing your life- raw and vulnerable and attracting people to you- the real you, then keep reading! 

The Mandatory Question: What The Heck Is Vulnerability?

One of the most quoted definitions of vulnerability is from Brené Brown “Vulnerability is about showing up and being seen. It’s tough to do that when we’re terrified about what people might see or think.”

As small children, we are open and free, sharing all of ourselves with others. Until something very painful happens: your best friend reveals your secret to someone and that someone decides to share with everyone. And now you’re exposed. This can be one of the most traumatic experiences for a child. Did you ever experience how is like being exposed and ashamed as a kid? I did… plenty of times.

As we grow and mature, we soon learn that the world can be a very painful place. We learn that not everyone is on our side, and not all situations are going to go our way. We get disappointed and go through growing pains, and that’s how the fear of vulnerability is formed.

Think about your first love. You believed in eternity. You thought this was the only person you could ever loved. And then… You got hurt. 

The fear of vulnerability is ultimately a fear of rejection or abandonment. You have been hurt before, so you seek to minimize the risk of being hurt again.

Why Is Vulnerability A Good Thing, Especially For Your Marketing?

Vulnerability is scary. However, if you are business owners, c-suite executives, leaders, or trying to build a name and a personal brand, vulnerability is needed.

Here’s why:

The well-known neuroscientist, Antonio Damasio stated, “We are not thinking machines that feel rather, we are feeling machines that think.”

Damasio made this discovery: every human decision depends on emotion — every single one. 

We make each choice somatically. In other words, we feel each decision out.

In sum, it’s about EMOTIONS. 

Your personal-vulnerable stories will get you closer to your audience. Even more than your superhero stories. In general, people relate more with struggles than with wins.

Vulnerable Leaders Are Confident 

People who do have a lot of self-confidence, are actually willing to show more of themselves. They’re willing to be vulnerable because they’re not afraid that someone might come in and take advantage of that. A recent set of studies calls this phenomenon “the beautiful mess effect.” It suggests that everyone should be less afraid of opening up—at least in certain cases.

The best example: video marketing! 

Have you ever used video to increase your business? Have you thought about it but decided it wasn’t for you? Did you try it and feel embarrassed and not want to do it again? Even if you are a pro in video marketing, you know that the struggle is real, especially for women!  We need to have the perfect background, the perfect hair and makeup, perfect nails, and of course, the idea of what we are saying. It’s exhausting. 

With video, the more you do it, the more confident you get on camera, and then you learn that it’s ok if you mess up. You laugh and move on.  By the way, I want to add a side note here and feature Barnes Team Media from Austin, Texas. They are educators on how to perform better on camera. You should check them out! Mike & Kim Barnes!

The next time you’re hesitating about sharing a great message on video, just think about the beautiful mess effect.  People love messy! People love reality shows!

But what about your content marketing, in particular, social media marketing, how vulnerable do you really need to be? Where is the line between vulnerability and privacy?

The Golden Rule of Social Media: Be Personal, Not Private 

In my book, The 6 Golden Rules of Social Media, rule #3 is Be Personal, But Not Private. 

We all have that one friend on social media who tells us what she had for breakfast, what she wore to work today, the fight she just had with her mother, the supervisor at her job that constantly calls her out and, you know, I could go on and on about her life, or, just go check her social media pages to tell you exactly what is going on with her. 

This is exactly WHAT NOT TO DO on social media. It is a desperate cry for attention and while you need the attention and you want new visitors to your social media profiles and pages, this is not the way to get it. In fact, this type of behavior attracts the attention you really don’t need.

You need to be more intentional with what you share on social media, especially if you want to attract a high-level profile. 

While you’re here, download a PDF of my book, The 6 Golden Rules of Social Media

Give Your Audience What They Want (It’s 4 Things)

Think about what your friends want to see from you. 

Normally, people are open to know about things that benefit them, such as: 

  1. How to save money
  2. How to make more money
  3. How to save time, or 
  4. How to save efforts. 

Those are the top motivators. You see, it’s not about you! It’s about them.

People don’t want to remember how dramatic your life is or how tough it is to be a parent. We all go through highs and lows. People don’t want constant reminders of your lows; especially when you have poor judgment on your images.

Your friends don’t need to see your c-section scar, bleeding, to know that you have a baby and it was a c-section. 

You are entitled to a private life that you share with your family and close friends, away from your business. Do not cross the line of displaying your private life on social media.

Marketing is all about igniting human connections. You want to activate the power of emotions by being a human, to ignite those connections and then, give your audience what they want. 

Is that simple! If you’re a content creator, having a clear understanding of how to humanize a brand without crossing the line is very important.

My Vulnerable #10yearchallenge

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My #10yearchallenge ⁣ ⁣ Disclaimer: Do not believe everything you read. People are sharing on this 10 year challenge what’s convenient. They want you to believe that life is like going on an elevator and you get older and everything gets fixed. ⁣ ⁣ That’s not true. ⁣ ⁣ 2009 – 2019 Was a very hard period. I was either pregnant, or coming out of a pregnancy. ⁣ Trying to figure things out.⁣ ⁣ ——⁣ Career wise, a roller coaster. Won a lot and lost a lot. ⁣ ⁣ —-⁣ ⁣ I’m grateful for the blessings but I’m more grateful for the adversity I’ve lived over the last 10 years. It has sharpened me to be who I am today. ⁣ ⁣ —-⁣ ⁣ So… the picture! 2009 we came to Austin to visit some family. They took us to Mount Bonell. We were living in Connecticut and honestly this trip planted the seed of us moving to Austin. ⁣ ⁣ We moved in 2013 when I was pregnant of Priscilla. ⁣ ⁣ We were a family of 4 and now a family of 6 and 2 dogs. And yes, we ended the rat race which is a big win! ⁣ ⁣ But again, there were plenty of challenges too. ⁣ ⁣ I hope to read your 10 yr story! Tag me! #10yearchallenge #adecade #growing #growthmindset #mondaymotivation #instagood #inspiredaily

A post shared by Jessica Campos, JD, BBA (@coachjessicacampos) on

I wish I could tell you that in 10 years, I moved a magic wand and my life changed mysteriously.  Well, that’s not true.

I wish I could tell you that in 10 years, I went from my 30’s to my 40’s and I retired with millions of dollars in the bank. This isn’t the case. I had multiple wins between 2010-2013 and several losses in 2014. Those generated plenty of changes for all of us. Changes that were scary, but we are now grateful for all.

I wish that in 10 years I didn’t find myself 50 pounds heavier, and still struggling with my diet. But that’s not the case.

In reality, I can claim some wins. More wins than losses. But I would be a fraud if I tell you everything has been incredibly great. Our family of 6 has seen adversity.  It’s extremely difficult pursuing your personal goals, business goals while raising a family with intentionality.  I wish more people were real when sharing their #10yearchallenge.

My goal for the next ten years is to be present. To be real. To be vulnerable.  This might explain why my personal Facebook is off. I want to figure some things out before I go ahead and create content: for whom?

The last decade was all about growing a massive audience. For some reason, it doesn’t serve me well. I’m all about quality, not quantity.

I have realized how much I love being a small business owner, in particular, a solopreneur and how much I love helping others succeed; especially those who need me the most.

This is me- the real me. With grammatical errors and a crazy accent.

Being vulnerable has opened plenty of doors for me. I wish I had known this 9 years ago, when I was hiding my mistakes, my accent, and tried to be someone else.

If you’re in the process of building a personal brand, take vulnerability seriously and build an audience that you can connect with. Find that line that allows you to connect with your tribe, for real. And just focus on being you, just a little bit better each day.

Don’t Forget This Marketing Secret

The most important element of your content marketing strategy or social media marketing strategy is your reputation. Without great customer service and a great reputation, every marketing effort will be worthless.

Explore my new Business Accelerator Program! Click here or the image below!

These 3 Winning Strategies For Your LinkedIn Prospecting Will Hack Your B2B Sales Cycle

The following is an introduction to the business-changing strategy we teach at our LinkedIn training, LinkedIn Ninja.  

Our 5 step sales process guides b2b sales people and sales teams  from selecting the right prospects, making first their brand, selecting their sales process, creating a content marketing strategy, prospecting with confidence to reach decision makers, and getting the deal closed.

I hope that it will help you build a reliable sales strategy you can use to close more deals.

B2B sales, particularly in the service arena, has traditionally been approached as a very linear process, based on a careful map of the buyer pathway, starting with step one, which is usually an introduction to the company and its product line, followed by a pitch on why those products would be useful to the potential buyer and what the benefits would be.

The linear sales process begins with an assumption that the prospect knows very little about you.

This assumption is completely wrong, considering the fact that most consumers come to speak with a B2B salesperson or B2C, with almost 60% of the information they need to know.

These days, selling it’s about what you don’t know that you don’t know.

Pitching features and benefits or pain points no longer work.

The linear sales process is obsolete. Digital sales processes have moved out of the consumer realm and into B2B. B2b buyers are more educated, and the sales process begins not with an introduction, but with an assessment of how much the prospect already knows about you. Usually, it will be a lot.

Educated customers, empowered by the internet and the ready availability of information about your offerings – as well as those of your competitors – have effectively killed the linear sales process, and replaced it with something much more effective.

If pitching features and benefits or pain points is no longer effective, does that mean that we need to build relationships? (And wait a long time?) No.

If you think that you can be more successful using a consultative selling approach that is all about building relationships, you should read an article about a Harvard Study that reveals the opposite: Selling is Not About Relationships.

In summary, this Harvard study found that salespeople fall into 5 categories:

1.Relationship Builders focus on developing strong personal and professional relationships and advocates across the customer organization. They are generous with their time, strive to meet customers’ every need, and work hard to resolve tensions in the commercial relationship.

2.Hard Workers show up early, stay late, and always go the extra mile. They’ll make more calls in an hour and conduct more visits in a week than just about anyone else on the team.

3.Lone Wolves are the deeply self-confident, the rule-breaking cowboys of the sales force who do things their way or not at all.

4.Reactive Problem Solvers are, from the customers’ standpoint, highly reliable and detail-oriented. They focus on post-sales follow-up, ensuring that service issues related to implementation and execution are addressed quickly and thoroughly.

5.Challengers use their deep understanding of their customers’ business to push their thinking and take control of the sales conversation. They’re not afraid to share even potentially controversial views and are assertive — with both their customers and bosses.

“In our study, Relationship Builders come in dead last, accounting for only 7% of all high performers.”

The days of inviting a connection for coffee- who technically is a suspect and you want to convert is from suspect to prospect- are over.

Before booking your next coffee appointment, consider becoming a LinkedIn Ninja by mastering social selling. Yes, you can find clients online.

According to Hubspot, for most salespeople, social selling on LinkedIn is a way of life. They keep their profiles in tip-top shape, look up their prospects’ profiles before calling or emailing, and keep close tabs on what potential customers post in groups. Reps also know how to search for prospects and narrow results by industry, company, location, and other specifications.

In other words, they’re experts in the basics of LinkedIn prospecting. 

I refer to them as “Linkedin Ninjas”. They are sales professionals with a solid LinkedIn profile. Our lessons help them understand the power of a strong social media presence. We give them tools, scripts, and strategies to drive their sales pipelines using a consultative selling approach. And they get results!

We have successfully ignited sales using these sales LinkedIn prospecting strategies for insurance brokers, mortgage lenders, small business owners, coaches, and consultants that want to reach decision makers.

3 Strategies To Hack Your LinkedIn for Sales Prospecting

Here’s the truth about LinkedIn in 2019:

It’s a B2B gold mine…

It’s where most Fortune 500 decision-makers and executives like to spend their spare time.

According to LinkedIn’s blog, 61 million LinkedIn users are senior level influencers and 40 million are in decision-making positions.

If you want to break your long selling cycle, building trust with your connections should be your main goal.  

These are our 3 strategies that will help you build trust and hack your sales prospecting.

Add a Video on Your LinkedIn Profile

Creating quality videos doesn’t mean an end-all solution to guaranteeing customer trust.  But videos add an excellent way to relay the value in your business.

Keep in mind, building trust is not about pitching your products. It’s about featuring your brand story, the type of qualities your brand values, what makes you unique, and what kind of impact are you creating with your products or services.

Linkedin Articles

If you want to leave a great first impression for decision makers, you want to brand yourself as an authority.

The word authority comes from author.

Focus on LinkedIn Articles and publish in your field. Create a content marketing calendar and distribute your content consistently, so your audience gets used to read you and expects to read even more content from you. You can also ask your audience for what they want to learn from you.

Contribute a guest post  

When readers see your work on a top site, you immediately gain credibility. After all, if a well-respected professional is willing to publish your work, you must know what you are talking about!

Put your money where your mouth is and show your readers how you have helped your customers or clients. Introduce case studies into your content marketing strategy. This is a powerful tool and a concrete example of  your success.

LinkedIn articles are a great way to leverage your content marketing strategy.

LinkedIn Endorsements

There are key metrics people chase on LinkedIn; 500+ connections, an all-star profile ranking. However, most people forget to set up goals to get more endorsements.

According to LinkedIn, someone who thanks you for an endorsement has a 74% chance of endorsing you.  That is pretty powerful.

Reach out to your connections. Endorse them.  Depending on your industry, connections will be active and happy to endorse you back for something they recognize is in your skillset.

In my personal case (you might do the same) if I see a connection that I trust on the list of your endorsements, I don’t think twice to give an endorsement.

The key to this Linkedin strategy is to give endorsements first.

A ninja tip: endorse decision makers. This will take you closer to your sales goals.

For a deeper dive into these LinkedIn Ninja strategies that pave the way for sales, check out our LinkedIn Ninja course. Now available via Teachable App! Not sure if this is for you? Chat with us.